


But then I got high

by Canttouchthis



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drug Use, F/M, Marijuana, One Shot, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Ridiculous, Room of Requirement Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:27:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27768277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canttouchthis/pseuds/Canttouchthis
Summary: Hermione and Draco inadvertently find themselves stoned out of their minds in the Room of Requirement.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy
Comments: 7
Kudos: 68





	But then I got high

**Author's Note:**

> This is a plot bunny brought to you by a debate with [Melanoradrood](https://archiveofourown.org/users/melanoradrood/pseuds/melanoradrood) about Draco's creepy fascination with Hermione's hair in her lovely and bittersweet story [Wish I Could Be](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27656180) (which you should definitely read). 
> 
> This story, however, devolved into porn without plot...my bad...
> 
> I do highly recommend listening to "Because I got high" by Afroman to really feel the effect of this piece...

“I don’t feel good.” Hermione mumbled to herself on the plush couch in the Room of Requirement. The world seemed - loopy. Her body felt boneless, relaxed in a way she was entirely unfamiliar with. 

“Granger, what are you doing here?” Malfoy’s familiar drawl intruded on her reverie. Hermione jumped, turning to the left to see him lounging on the couch beside her.

“What?” she blinked at him, trying in vain to get her bearings, “how long have you been there?”

Malfoy cocked his head to the side, frowning, “Er,” he looked  _ very _ serious, his brows furrowed and lips pursed.

Hermione  _ laughed _ , she couldn’t help it, she just kept laughing at Malfoy’s completely ridiculous face. And as she devolved, his face grew more confused, only furthering her amusement.

“Malfoy - your face,” she was now pointing at him, tears trickling down her cheeks.

He attempted to scoff, but also started laughing, “I don’t know why I’m laughing,” he managed to get out.

“Uh oh,” she realized as the last chuckles escaped her throat. She whispered, “I think I’m high.”

Malfoy’s face once more became etched in concentration, “Is that what this is?”

She considered her predicament - the fuzziness of her surroundings, her strange desire for salty foods and the overwhelming amusement she found at pretty much everything - and felt reasonably confident that she was, in fact, totally stoned.

“You are too?” she scrunched her nose, trying to find some proof, “wait a minute - how did we get here?”

The last thing she recalled was wandering away from the Great Hall after Harry had given her some weird tasting chocolate.

“Pansy gave me chocolate and pushed me in here...I think...or maybe it was Nott?” Malfoy contemplated.

“Oh my gosh Malfoy,” Hermione grabbed his arm, her eyes wide, “I think they drugged us!”

His eyes bulged, “But - why?”

Hermione had no idea why. It wasn’t like she and Malfoy had spent all of 8th year bickering with each other or had a ridiculous amount of obvious unresolved sexual tension.

“What do we do? I’ve never been high. Do we tell McGonagall?” Hermione asked, assuming the blonde had more information on this subject then she did.

“Are you kidding Granger?” He drawled, but apparently found the comment hilarious because he broke down once more into laughter, which caused  _ Hermione _ to break down in laughter.

“Oh, yeah,” Hermione mumbled eventually between giggles. She realized her hand was still on his arm, and the way his blonde hair stood on end was utterly fascinating. She stared until she felt him stiffen.

“What are you doing?” he squinted his eyes at her.

“Did you know your arm is really soft?” She gaped, pressing her fingers to his forearm and rubbing them against his exposed skin.

“Er,” he took his arm back, eyeing her carefully.

She shrugged, unbothered, “Do you want to do something?” 

He blinked in confusion, “Like what?”

She paused, contemplating the options. She considered perhaps they could play a game, or talk about the Arithmancy assignment or their upcoming NEWTS. But thinking about school made her giggle for some reason and she once more considered the utter absurdity of the situation she found herself in.

“Granger - you there?” Malfoy was waving a hand in front of her and she realized she’d been sitting there, just staring into space for minutes.

“You’re very pale,” she told him.

He gawked at her, though after a moment she realized his gaze was fixed on her hair, “Can I touch it?” he asked, his hand inches from her brown locks.

“Er,” she watched him carefully, his grey eyes fixed on her frizzy hair, “yeah?”

He giggled as he ran his hands through her hair, “It feels funny.”

She couldn’t help snorting in response, “Yeah,” she confirmed. She shut her eyes, finding she oddly enjoyed the feeling of his fingers brushing through her brown tresses. 

She found herself lying with her head in his lap, his eyes watching her as his fingers continued to work through her hair, “Why don’t we hang out more?” she asked him.

He appeared thoughtful, “I feel like there’s a good reason but I can’t think of it…” he trailed off.

She lay there, inexplicably comfortable, tapping her fingers against her stomach and humming.

“What’s that?” he asked.

“Hmm?”

“Your hmm hmmm hmmm,” he tried to imitate her humming.

“Oh it’s a song about getting high: ‘I was gonna go to class, but then I got high’ it's by Afroman,” she explained, proceeding to sing ‘because I got high, because I got high, because I got high..’

His hand movements paused and he snorted, “That’s hilarious.”

“Right?” She smiled, nodding her agreement.

She felt his fingers tentatively move from her hair to her shoulder. Her breath hitched at the contact momentarily but she quickly relaxed as he ran his fingers up and down her arms.

“That feels nice,” she closed her eyes and told him. He ‘hmmd’ and she moved her hands to brush against his leg. “What are we doing?” She said ethereally. She felt his gaze land on hers and they just stared at each other for what felt like hours. 

He reached down and kissed her, his lips pushing gently against hers. She grabbed the back of his head, her fingers tangling with his blonde mane, pulling him closer to her.

She shut her eyes, absorbed in the kiss which somehow tasted like chocolate and cinnamon. His tongue teased at her, swiping at her lower lip until she gasped, opening her mouth for him. She could feel the soft rumble of laughter escape his mouth, while his hands continued to wander up and down her sides. 

She felt a warmth run through her, from her reddened cheeks down to her core. She sat up too quickly, feeling momentarily dazed as the room spun.

She laughed, grabbing Malfoy’s hand to keep her steady.

“What?” He asked, his mouth inches from her ear.

“I’m just - really high I think,” she turned to him, a playful smirk on her face and kissed him, adjusting herself so that she was effectively straddling his lap, facing him.

“Er - should we be doing this?” Malfoy asked her, his voice low and breathy.

“I mean,” she moaned, feeling his length pressing against her, “I’d be lying if I said I never thought about it.” She giggled, not quite believing she said it aloud.

His eyebrows shot up; he was probably trying to come off as haughty or smirk at her but the effect was dulled by his bloodshot eyes, “Yeah.” He ended up mumbling into her hair, kissing her neck.

“Malfoy,” she whispered, moving her hand to the waistband of his trousers. She felt his breath hitch, his hands freeze momentarily against her sides. She felt the corner of her lips pull up as she pushed her hand beneath his boxers. He breathed roughly on her neck, his hand slowly pushing up her shirt.

The sensations were completely foreign, but not unpleasant. His every touch and kiss elicited a shiver - a shock of pleasure. His fingers deftly slipped under her bra all while she continued her ministrations, relishing his moans. She felt his fingers pause against her chest, his breaths grow heavy against her neck and his length grow harder at her urging. She couldn’t help the soft giggles that left her as he came undone, his hands gripping her shirt while he shuddered against her.

“But then I got highhh,” she started singing to herself, giggling slightly as Malfoy’s hands started wandering. She had imagined this before, at nights alone in her bedroom, but nothing compared to the feeling of his hands moving up her skirt, his fingers pressing against her nub. While his hands continued to work her, she sucked at a spot beneath his ear, pressing her hips against his fingers.

“How does that feel, Granger?’ She trembled at the way he breathed her name, eliciting a soft ‘oh’ in response. She felt two of his fingers press into her, his motions purposeful. She was close to the edge, moving up and down against his fingers. Her hands moved to press into his hair, her fingers gripping his blond curls as she rode out her orgasm.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, grabbing her waist and pressing a hard kiss against her mouth. She kept her hands in his hair, shivering at the feel of his tongue drawing an outline on her bottom lip. A sly smile crossed her face as she felt him become erect once more.

She broke the kiss, stepping away to remove her shirt and skirt, the action made less sexy as she nearly tripped over the skirt, causing an eruption of giggles to escape her lips. He grabbed at her waist to keep her from falling, his hands snaking over every inch of exposed skin. She yanked at his button up shirt, ripping at it until his alabaster chest and torso were exposed.

She swallowed, biting at her lower lip as she took in his exposed skin. She brushed kisses against his neck, his length hardening against her thigh. Malfoy spelled his pants off, sitting exposed beneath her.

His fingers pushed down her knickers, running along her wet folds. She hissed, pressing her knees against the couch and positioning her entrance against him. “You sure about this, Granger?” he asked her, his fingers running along her sides.

She nodded, whispering, “Fuck yeah.” She exhaled, lowering herself as he filled her in one thrust. His hands stayed in her hair, yanking at her unruly curls as she pressed herself up and down against him.

She arched her back, closing her eyes while her hands clutched his sides. His hands moved to her arse, squeezing and pushing her up and down against him. She wrapped her legs around his back, her eyes rolling into the back of her head at the increased friction as she rubbed against him.

His thrusts became more urgent, his breaths growing steadily shorter. She matched his rhythm, an erratic motion as she felt another orgasm near. “Malfoy,” she whispered into his ear, lightly biting down on his lobe. He swallowed, sharply exhaling in response, his finger moving between them to find her aching clit. 

It was a blur at that point - turbulent thrusts and heady breathing until they both found their release. Hermione collapsed atop him, her face pressed against his now sweaty neck. 

“Holy shit,” she mumbled, moving off of him so she sat next to him.

“Yeah,” he looked at her, and the pair broke down into yet another fit of giggles.

“We should get high more often,” she raised her eyebrows, biting her lower lip.

“Anytime, anywhere Granger”.


End file.
